Malibu, CA—Stock photography supermodel Dreamweaver Jones, who has asked to be referred to by his legal name Dreamweaver Baumgartner, has come forward with allegations of mistreatment against the stock photo industry. The bombshell statements follow decades of apathy and an overall neutral opinion of the stock photo industry by the general public.
In a soon to be filed suit, Dreamweaver alleges that the outfits he was made to wear and scenarios he was made to act out were cruel and unusual.
“It starts with normal shoots on a date at a restaurant or in a business meeting,” Dreamweaver began at a press conference held at his Solstice Canyon mansion, “but as the checks grow larger so too do the demands. You get this uneasy feeling creeping in that tells you something isn’t right.”
“It gets to a point when being told to hold a pair of watermelons like they’re infants or stand at a urinal while wearing a clown suit feels normal. That’s when I knew that I couldn’t keep quiet any longer.”
Dreamweaver went on to recount the contumelies that he received on a daily basis. “You’ll do what we say and you’ll like it,” he remembers one unnamed but prominent bigwig of the stock photography industry screaming at him as he slipped into a banana suit and proceeded to point a prop gun at a bushel of bananas that he was made to hold in his other hand. “He kept telling me to smile like a good little model, like he got some sort of sick pleasure out of humiliating me.”
At time of reporting no spokesperson from the stock photography industry had shared any comment on the suit.
